Bay Bridge Blues: The End of a Brief San Francisco Flirtation

Oh, San Francisco we hardly knew ye!

But alas it was not meant to be.  After a nearly month-long flirtation with the Bay Area, I've recently received word that I was not offered a position at either nonprofit I applied to in the area.  Combine that with having heard from another nonprofit in the city in December that I would not be offered a position and it's safe to say that The City By The Bay and I will not be forming an everlasting bond any time soon.

Although this is a setback, I choose to see it as a positive experience.  Not only did I get to have a total of 4 in-person interviews where I got to fine-tune my interviewing skills but I also had a chance to make it into the city and surrounding area, something I had only had a chance to do once so far since I moved to Northern California.  I not only had a chance to drive around the city's famous hills with a manual transmission but I also had a chance to reconnect with an old friend and his wife in the city and go for a hike at the nearby Muir Woods National Park.  Although I will not miss the early morning commute (roughly two-and-a-half hours from Sacramento), I will miss the anticipation of it all and wondering each time I made that commute if this would be the opportunity to get me back on my feet.

Each position I applied for in the region was in a similar vein:  It was an education nonprofit working with low-income students to provide them with support and resources to help them both attend and gradate from college.  At this point, I can safely say that my education resume and cover letter are solid as each organization contacted me after I submitted those materials and then scheduled me for an initial phone interview.  Although I cannot remember the exact specifics of each particular phone interview the questions were roughly the same:  Describe your teaching experience.  Have you worked with this population before?  Have you taken on an adviser or mentor role?  What experience do you have working with a team?  What experience do you have working with parents?  What is your classroom management philosophy?  And the list goes on.

With my teaching background, I was able to comfortably answer those questions.  In fact, it was being able to work with that population that made me want to apply to all three positions in the first place.  It helps that not only do I want to work with students of a low socio-economic background but that I also have worked with that population as well.  I personally believe that you need to have that actual experience to work in that environment as it is a lot more difficult than working with students from more affluent backgrounds.  Students of low socio-economic backgrounds come with a whole lot of baggage and if you haven't experienced it, it might be shocking as to just how many issues they're dealing with outside of the classroom.

So, fortunately each organization found me worthy of at least meeting in person.  I knew that I wanted to limit the amount of times I drove into the city (for both time and monetary reasons) so the first day I actually scheduled two second round interviews on the same day:  One at 10:00 A.M. and the second at 1:30 P.M.  I figured I would be able to end the first interview, then move my car toward the second interview which was in the financial district, (hopefully) find parking, get lunch and then make it to my second interview.  That was the plan at least and surprisingly it worked.  Parking was a pain to find but I got there around noon and used my Smart Phone to find a restaurant within a block of where my second interview was.  I then was able to leave the city around 3 thereby beating the impending rush hour which was sure to cause havoc on those leaving around 5 P.M.

In terms of the interviews themselves, I felt that the second one went better than the first.  At the end of the first interview, a manager briefly came in to introduce herself and just ask me if I had any questions.  We chatted briefly and she left me her business card.  It was then I knew I wouldn't be asked back as I had previously gotten a business card at the end of my in-person interview for a job here in Sacramento as well.  It's essentially a way for employers to make you think they care about you when they really don't.  I know it sounds cynical, but it's the truth.  Why would you ever want to contact an organization that didn't want you?  However, the organization does it to give you a false sense of optimism when you leave the interview.  Psychology 101.  My assessment proved correct when they emailed me a week later telling me I was not offered the position.

The second interview went better and I didn't get a business card at the end of it!  That interview went well and I was actually complemented on several of my answers, something the other interviewers didn't really seem to do.  At the end of the interview, I was told that they would be interviewing candidates and would let people know if they had advanced in a couple weeks.  Since this was right around the holidays, they said that there would be a slight delay between second and third round interviews.  I took this in stride and was actually surprised when they got back to me right after the New Year to ask me back for a third and final round interview.  It would be on a Wednesday and would require me to read over a hypothetical "case study" of a student and then submit how I would address certain concerns with that student.  I took a full afternoon to do this and scheduled a third round interview at 2:30.

Shortly after I received this invitation, I received a different invitation from a third San Francisco nonprofit that wanted to schedule a second interview.  Again, I felt it would be best to make one trek into the city instead of two so I opted for the Wednesday 9:00 A.M. slot.  This meant I would have to get up at the righteous hour of 5:00 A.M. to get there but I figured it was better to bite the bullet than make two separate trips.  I was also told that there would be parking, so I brought sneakers with me and decided that I would walk to my second interview and back rather than have to worry about parking.  It ended up being about a 3 mile walk but it was a nice day and I enjoyed the exercise.

The first interview again ended without a business card so this seemed to be another positive development.  I definitely wanted to keep my options open but if I could actually have not one but two job offers then that would be a huge opportunity.  I felt that either place I was interviewing at would be a good job and would be something that I would enjoy doing.  I then trekked to my second interview, grabbed some lunch at The Cheesecake Factory overlooking Saks Fifth Avenue, did some reading in the lobby to kill time, and then got to my third round interview.  In addition to reviewing the case study, I also had a chance to talk to a pair of employees and ask them general questions about the organization, and I had a chance to interact with two students in the program.  I felt the interview went well and I was told that the organization would make its final decisions by the end of the next week.  With that in mind, I had some time to kick back and relax for the time being and I actually looked up an old fraternity brother and his wife in the city and stopped by their place for dinner.  This was someone I hadn't seen since college so it was great catching up with him and also sharing his food and fine whiskey before I left and headed back to Sacramento.

Six days later I received an email from the second organization stating they wanted to have me back for a third round interview.  Since I hadn't heard anything from the other organization I decided to continue the interview process so once again I got up at 5 AM, drove for over 2 1/2 hours and got to San Francisco for a 9 A.M. interview.  This time, I brought with me hiking gear as I was intent on visiting Mount Tamalpais State Park after my interview as a way to explore the area and kill the rest of the day in the city.  This interview went well and once again I didn't receive a business card so this seemed promising.  I was told that there actually was a FOURTH round interview for candidates that advanced that far in which they would meet with the CEO.  I was told that I would be contacted if I had made it to that point.  After I left, I made the hour-long drive to Mount Tam and eventually found a trail that led to Muir Woods, where Return of the Jedi was filmed.  When you think of California redwoods you probably think of Muir Woods and even though it was a sloppy, wet hike it was definitely worth doing.  I even went down the Pacific Coast Highway for a bit on the way back before heading back to Sacramento.

That was Wednesday.  On Friday I was out to lunch with a friend and saw I had a missed call and voicemail.  This was at 2:30.  Rut-roh.  As I pointed out in a previous blog, Friday afternoons are notorious for letting employees know they weren't offered a position.  I had that sinking feeling when I checked my voicemail and sure enough, I did not get the position.  I sent an email to follow-up at to the reasons and was told that the organization was looking for someone with more "individual" mentoring experience.  This struck me as odd because the organization knew my background as a classroom teacher who also taught an advisory class.  In addition, one of the people I talked to in my final interview joined the organization because she, like myself, wanted more one-on-one interaction with students.  If the organization had concerns that I had never done one-on-one mentoring then they should have let me go after the second interview and not strung me along.  At least, that's how I saw the situation upon further reflection.

So that was the end of organization one but I still had hope for organization two.  At least, I had hope until Tuesday.  Tuesday afternoon I had a missed call (I swear this is my last iPhone) and voice message to call the person who had previously interviewed me.  I did so and was told that they had offered the position to another candidate.  Again, in an effort to better myself I asked what I could have done differently.  This person told me that they had concerns over my classroom management.  This was an odd response to me because they had asked me a single question about it and I had answered with my go-to response about how the best classroom management is a good lesson plan.  If they had wanted specifics, I would have provided them but I was not pressed so I figured my answer was satisfactory.  I don't know how you can rule somebody out who says that as long as he is teaching an engaging lesson from bell-to-bell then students will be unlikely to misbehave if he has done his job and has created a meaningful lesson for the day.  But alas, it was not to be.

So again, I'm a little disappointed but not downtrodden by any means.  It it all three of those organization's loss and I won't shed any tears or break any plates over their decision.  It's simply another bump in the road for a career that I will ultimately find fulfilling.  Had I not gotten the interviews I would have never experienced an early morning commute to the city, driven its hills, caught up with my friend, been to Muir Woods from Mount Tam State Park, and driven down from the park to the PCH.  I can officially add San Francisco to my list of conquered cities to go along with Boston, New York City, Charlotte, Los Angeles, San Diego, Denver, and Sacramento.

At the very least I won't have to worry about that San Francisco commute for a long time.

Home and Back Again: Reflections on a Three-Week Trip to the Great White North

What a difference three weeks can make.

For the past twenty-one days I was either in route to, in, or departing from my childhood hometown of Londonderry, New Hampshire.  I came home with two half-full suitcases and left with two full suitcases as well as a clearer perception of where I was both personally and professionally.  The three weeks were eventful and served as a healthy break from my Sacramento life that had been centered on my ongoing job search.  By the end of my time in New Hampshire, much had changed from the moment I landed at Logan Airport in Boston to the moment I took off in Manchester, New Hampshire.

The first thing that was clarified during my trip was my job situation.  Unbeknownst to anyone except my immediate family, I had applied for a position at a homeowner's insurance company in Andover, Massachusetts.  It was the same company that my father had worked for for thirty-five years and as he was schedule to retire, he mentioned that the company would be looking to fill a position fairly quickly.  I had never envisioned myself doing this type of work but my father sold me on the idea of finding a profession where you could help people but also one that could provide financial stability for yourself and your family.  He said the company was one where hardly anybody left and was one that had afforded him the ability to be the sole wager earner in the family while my mother stayed home and raised me.  At thirty years of age (soon to be thirty-one), I couldn't deny that finding professional stability was extremely appealing, especially after struggling to find work for the past five months.  I told my father I was interested and he got the ball rolling.

I ended up having a brief interview with the company's vice president to gauge my interest in the position.  I told him of my desire to establish a career after several years of unsuccessfully being able to do so and that I believed that I could do so with the company.  That answer seemed to be satisfactory and the vice president then informed me that the next step in the process was to fill out a personal summary which was to be sent to me in Sacramento.  The personal summary is something that the company had used for decades and it was essentially a longer, more exhaustive way to determine a person's work history, motivations, and desires.  It is hand-written and once it is completed, it is reviewed by hiring personnel, management, and a psychiatrist whom everyone at the company refers to as "the Doc."  If there are any "red flags" or concerns, then the candidate is not advanced to the next level of the hiring process.

In completing my personal summary, I was wary of exactly what I was doing.  It was hard to find a balance between being completely honest and also not making myself seem unemployable.  How do you justify leaving a job?  Does it sound conceited to say you weren't given opportunities to reach your potential?  Do you sound disgruntled if you left over a lack of faith in the leadership of an organization?  Do you sound flaky if you left a situation that you knew would present problems for you down the line?  All of these were things I had to consider in detailing my work history and also providing answers on such questions that dealt with previous supervisors and bosses.  For someone who has had five jobs in eight years, how do I make it sound like lucky job number six will end with a different result than the previous five?

I did my best to reconcile these questions and I completed the summary in a timely and efficient manner.  I mailed it a few days before I left and I received word that it arrived to the company the day I was scheduled to be home.  I didn't hear anything on the matter for a few days, which was good because my second day home I contacted a gnarly head cold that lasted nearly a week.  During that time, I waited out the response from the company and aired out my suit and dress shirt, which I had packed in my suitcase should the need arise to be called for an in-person interview.  My dad gave me the advice that if for whatever reason my personal summary was rejected that I should request an in-personal interview to address any concerns.

This would be advice that would come in handy three days before Christmas.

On the 22nd of December, I received an email from the vice president of the company stating that the company had rejected my candidacy after reviewing my personal summary.  I was not particularly surprised by this and I had been mentally preparing a response ever since my dad brought up the possibility a few days prior.  With his words in my head, I composed a three-paragraph email where I put forth the case that I represented a unique situation in that I was coming from a background of previous employment that many candidates out of college did not have.  I stated that all of my work experiences had been learning experiences and that I now had a wealth of experience and knowledge thanks to each and every one of them.  I concluded the email by saying that I was sure that I could address any potential concerns over my employment in person and could clarify any issues that the personal summary might have raised.  The best way to do this, in my opinion, was to provide me an opportunity to do so via an in-person interview.

The vice-president's response?  Thanks, but no thanks.

And with that, the book was officially closed on me being a second generation LaFauci at this company.  I was disappointed but not heartbroken.  When I told my dad about it, I feel that he took it pretty hard.  I told him that I was disappointed with the decision but that I had accepted it and I asked that he do the same as well.  I didn't want my one experience with the company to sully his thirty-five year tenure at a company that had provided him with professional and financial stability.  Despite my plea, my dad ended up shooting off an email to one of his now-ex co-workers where he asked that the company reconsider its decision.  As much as I appreciated my dad's compassion, I knew that the issue should be put to rest so I actually emailed the same co-worker and told him that I was okay with the decision.  The truth is that it had reached the point that if I was hired, it now would have been a somewhat "controversial" decision.  There would have been at least one high-ranking manager who didn't think I should be there.  There would be rumors and whispers that I only got the job because of who my father was.  There would be people who would see me as having violated the time-honored hiring process by somehow circumventing it.  Overall, it would have been a huge can of worms that I didn't want to open.  I had moved on and once my dad got that email off his chest, I think that he was able to move on, too.

In addition to this job opportunity, I also spent time with my family.  I hadn't seen my parents in a year and I hadn't seen my mom since her second major back surgery in May.  My mom looked well, much better than she had in the previous two years.  She wasn't in as much pain and even managed to join my dad and I on Christmas eve when we went to our family dinner in North Andover, Massachusetts.  We were there for three hours and even though my mom was sore by the end, she was able to sit up and walk around the entire time there.  While she was less mobile, my dad had reached the other end of the spectrum and was overly-mobile.  Now that he was retired, he was focusing all his energy on an upcoming trip to Nepal in nine months where he and two of his friends would be hiking to Mount Everest base camp.  My dad and I went on a handful of walks and hikes in our town's local nature preserve and I helped him pick out a home printer he could use to help print out important trip-related documents.  I also convinced him to join me on a couple of excursions as we saw Star Wars on opening night and we saw Bill Clinton speak at a community college.  I thought about inviting him out to see Donald Trump with me as well but I realized that there was a chance I would protest the speech and get kicked out and I didn't want him to be there for that (don't worry, I held my tongue and didn't get assaulted at the rally).

I also got to see all of my Londonderry friends for the first time during one single trip.  I was able to see them at their houses, at the local pub for a Patriots game, at a local breakfast place, and New Year's Eve at my friend's home in Manchester.  I also got to skirt down to Boston for dinner with one of my fraternity brothers and our mutual friend who told me she was moving to San Diego and asked me to make a list of all the go-to places in the city.  I happily obliged.  My last night in town, I visited my best friend, his wife, and their fourteen-month old son.  The previous year when I was introduced to the little 'un, he slept on my shoulder for an hour and I was convinced that parenting was the easiest thing ever.  However, this year I learned that children don't always sleep and that they do run around the house and play with toys, boxes, books, lamps, the dog, and your hair.  Lesson learned for my future children that are due to start appearing in the fall of 2021.

Lastly, I also had a chance to do some reflecting and I was able to end two previous chapters in my life, both unplanned but definitely needed.  The first chapter I officially closed was my previous job.  It just so happened that I ran into my boss's boss at the Denver airport on the way home.  This is someone whom our last interaction had been a series of emails where I expressed deep concern over the organization and, in particular, the way my office was being run.  I believed that my boss's boss did his best to hear my concerns, but he essentially sided with my boss.  When I saw him in the airport, he clearly was not thrilled to see me.  In fact, he did the whole glance up at you and then immediately look away pretending not to have seen you thing.  However, I've always been one to try and put personal grudges behind me and so I got up and went over to him to shake his hand, make small talk, and wish him a happy holiday.  I don't think I'll ever see him again, so this accidental meeting was a nice way to give me closure on my time with the organization and to also know that when all was said I done, I was the bigger man in the whole situation.

The other chapter that was closed had to do with a previous girlfriend.  Despite breaking up, this person and I had remained friends over the years.  However, I got a random text from her on her birthday and everything bad about our relationship all came flooding back to me.  Her text reiterated that after all this time she hadn't changed and it finally dawned on me that I simply didn't want someone like that in my life anymore.  It was hard doing that after having known this person for five years, but it was something that had to be done.  The saying goes that some people will never change and this person is the epitome of that.  It's one thing to have flaws and to try and address them, it's another one to have flaws that people close to you recognize but you continue to ignore.  This person was simply selfish, she was when we were dating, and her text showed me that she was still selfish today.  Someone like that simply has no place in my life at this point so I pulled the plug on her my deleting both her number as well as her social media contacts.

And so, after three weeks I flew back to Sacramento to continue my job search.  My bags may have been heavier with Christmas goodies (mainly books and DVDs) but my heart was lighter by being able to clear up the job opportunity, seeing my family, seeing my friends, and closing two painful chapters in my life.  All and all, I'd say that constitutes a successful trip.